Monday, July 16, 2007

Honor Your Husband Challenge

Christine, who is hosting the honor your husband challenge, wrote this today:

"A couple of weeks ago while leading a book study at church on a Sunday morning a friend expressed the surprise and disappointment she felt the first time her marriage came to a valley. We discussed how in tough times we can actually feel strong dislike, even hatred, toward the one we have chosen to love above all others. How can this be?, we all wondered. We continued our conversation and agreed that it is only beyond those valleys that the mountaintops of marriage really mean something. We can pursue deeper meaning and spiritual and emotional connection with our husbands when we have weathered a storm (or two or twenty). The natural ups and downs of marriage can be opportunities, if we choose to see them as such, for growth toward our spouse and toward our Father."

It's always been astonishing to me how low the valley's of marriage can go and how deep the hurt can be. One minute you're on cloud nine with the most amazing person you have ever met, and the next your drowning in a Kleenex box wondering where you went wrong. I definitely did not expect the low, low valleys. Marriage always seemed like a fairy tale to me growing up, and the prince never hurts the princess in fairy tales right? I soon found out early on that my perfect "vision" of marriage was wrong. I knew marriage would take work, but seriously, ugh. I never envisioned how much! lol And of course, it's worth it. The peaks are better than anything in this world and after a storm is weathered we seem to grow closer together, and I always learn a little bit more about my heavenly father. I'm still figuring things out as I go, and still fear the dreaded valley. I'd like to stay on the mountain tops. Sometimes I wish men and women communicated better, and sometimes I wish my husband just magically knew how to love me every moment of every day. But then I know that God made us different for his own reasons and so I try to learn from the valleys when they arrive. One thing I have learned is that the more I pray for him and our marriage, the more I find fault in myself and things I need to do differently. So I'm thankful for challenges such as this that keep me vigilant in focusing on my husband's needs instead of mine. It's been a great month, a big thanks to Christine for hosting this challenge, and I look forward to linking up for the next one!


blackpurl said...

Beig married is one of the hardest, most incredible things I have ever done!

May God bless you and your husband!

Michelle said...

Dido, it is amazeing and rough at the same time. I am glad God has given me a husband that can put up with all of my irrational(sp) moments..

Jthemilker said...

You said it girl... marriage is hard, but worth it. And the more we go before God the more he molds us. Just when we thought God was going to make a big change in our hubby, our own hearts change. Wow. On another note - have you read The 5 Love Languages? Great book for helping us understand our mates. Blessings to you and yours!

Christine said...

You're not alone in your feelings. I think if, before we were married, we really believed all those well-meaning people that told us marriage was hard, no one would get married anymore!!

Blessing to you!